Sunday, September 20, 2009

Perspective


I was recently inspired by a friend (thanks, Rea) to consider the time I spend with my children making them feel like the blessings they are. I want my children to feel loved and valued as individuals. I want them to be secure in who they are and the love my husband and I have for each of them.

As much as I endorse this concept, it is difficult to make a reality in day-to-day interactions. There are so many interruptions and distractions from this grand undertaking that it almost seems impossible. I am often overwhelmed by the mucous-covered, dirty body parts and the bickering and the little screechy voices…It just makes me want to give up some days.

But I am not to grow weary doing good. And so I find the joy of the Lord to be my strength in this mission. He loves my kids more than I do. Surely, He’ll be willing to help me show how much I care in a way that is meaningful to their little hearts.

I have found that it is the joy of little moments with these precious people that adds up to a tremendous atmosphere of love in my heart. If I can focus and live in each moment as they come, this dismantles the lie that it’s too hard to love each kid the way they need to be loved. And we all grow closer together and stronger in our bonds. This makes tomorrow’s challenges just a minor puddle to hop over instead of a waterfall to cross.

Today was a good day for our bonds to grow. My oldest son and I shared a private joke with each other over a dozen times throughout the day. And we both thought it was funny the thirteenth time. I made a yummy, over-the-top dessert with my daughter beside me helping with each step. Our family worked on a huge project together to prepare some animal bones and skulls for display (very stinky work, but we did it together). My husband chuckled and encouraged our youngest son to make giggly, piggy faces against the mesh walls of his play yard. I was able to cuddle with our 5 year old son as he explained to me all the cool features of his favorite video game. My husband and I taught our oldest son to play Yahtzee tonight.

I know that these don’t really sound like monumental or important moments. But they were huge to me. I am not promised tomorrow. So what a joy it is to relish my blessings today!

All of us can brush off opportunities now and then to seize the moment with our children. But I need to overhaul my thinking so that I see my days as abundant in blessings instead of loaded with bothersome irritations.

Here are some reminders to me to keep my perspective in line with reality:
  • My children are not interrupting my housework. They are the reason I came home.
  • My children are not ruining my perfect school lesson plans. They are teaching me every day.
  • My children are not crowding out my dreams. They are giving me a legacy.
  • My children are not a nuisance or an annoyance. They remind me of God’s goodness and patience.
  • My children are not sent to punish me or make my life hard. They are sent to help me think of others as greater than myself.
  • My children are not insignificant or unimportant because of their youth. They are blessings with a spirit and a soul that need to be directed to God.
Leave me a comment below to let me know how the Lord has allowed you to take advantage of moments with your kids. How do you keep your perspective in line with God’s truth about your children? Is there something perhaps that you can suggest to frustrated young mothers who want to avoid seeing their children as a burden or a bother when the days are long and the children are under your feet?

Thanks for reading. I look forward to your comments.

3 comments:

  1. Hi Beth, it's me Jen again. The other day I punished my youngest son and I went to go talk to him afterwards. When he saw me, he ran into my arms, hugged me so tight and told me he loved me. What a gift from the Lord that was. Such encouragement when I feel like I fail every single day as their mother. If the Lord has infinite patience with me, why can't I show that same patience with these precious gifts He has given to me?

    Always enjoy reading your posts. Keep up the great work!

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  2. Jen, what a praise report for godly discipline!

    Proverbs 10:17a (AMP) tells us "He who heeds instruction and correction is [not only himself] in the way of life [but also] is a way of life for others." Your son is not only walking in righteousness when he accepts correction but he is leading the way for others to walk that narrow road.

    Proverbs 29:17 (The Message) says it clearly "Discipline your children; you'll be glad you did— they'll turn out delightful to live with." What a perspective this promise is in your life, Jen. Your praise report is a sign that God honors His word!

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  3. When my children were younger I had to work, odd hours and weekends too. On my days off, I'd clean some, then prep a picnic. When the kids got home from school, it was off to the beach or the park - we'd call my dh on the way to let him know where to meet us. I let them play a while, then they'd do their homework on the picnic table. Sometimes we did hot dogs and chips and sometimes ham sandwiches. My dh and I ran and played with them until dusk. Sometimes on the weekends my dh would say lets go for a drive - we'd find different parks to take our kids to - they were so exicted. Often we would ask my dh's sister to come along with her kids, but she always declined because it was saturday and she was cleaning. Or on the weeknite, she needed to mop the floor. My kids have grown up to be hard working, drug free, parents (2 still not parents). My sil's kids have both been in drug re-hab and counseling and they run with a very bad crowd. When my kids get together for dinner they often talk about how much fun it was to arrive home and have a picnic ready. And how much fun it was to have parents that played hide and seek. They never mention that you could eat off my floor or the bathroom was spotless! So my advise is clean when they are sleeping !

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